Imagine you are running around town at lunch one day in your little car. You are backing out of parking space and you back into to a pole or a concrete column or something. You also have 3 playboy stickers on the back of your car. They are not injured.

So what are you to do? Well, it’s not a busy day at work so you open up Word and you start typing. It’s your fault so you want to convey that you feel sorry for the car.

Arial or Times New Roman won’t do this time. Too formal. You change your font to Comic Sans. It’s a feel good font. Casual. You make sure you add sufficient exclamation points.

It takes several printouts to get the font size to be what you want it. You break out your scissors and trim up your note. On the way out to the parking lot, you stop by the mail room and borrow the packing tape.

You tape up the tail light and then your note. You step back and admire your work. Really nice work. Professionally done.

The only mistake you made (other than putting the note on your car) was getting in front of me in the drive-thru.

You probably remember a post back in April titled, “Wedding of the Year“. Well, I guess those people have some competition now.

As the famous twang of Hank Williams Jr. blasted from an SUV stereo Friday afternoon, about 30 folks socialized, sipped soda and puffed on cigarettes. George “Bubba” Mathis and Pamela Christian - employees at the Dacula, GA Waffle House - were married at their place of employment.

The Groom, George “Bubba” Mathis (age 23) (Photos: Benjamin Hager, Gwinnett Daily Post)

For years, the couple tried to marry on their Independence Day anniversary. But the bride was always scheduled to work. Instead of waiting any longer - she got the day off at the last minute; Mathis had to report for the morning shift - the couple of nine years decided to seal the deal at work.

The bride, Pamela Christian (age 23)

Standing nearby, the father of the newly minted Mrs. Pamela Mathis, William Christopher, wondered if anyone had videotaped the ceremony. He wants to send it in to CMT.

“I think it’s pretty redneck myself,” he said, laughing. “But I’m a redneck anyway, so.”

More photos and complete story

Which one to choose?

- Wishes come true
- Quick turn around on wishes = 3 days
- If you have an arrogant, cold-hearted lover, they will be subdued and forced on the right path

- Wishes come true in just 7 days
- Has 300 years of family service in the business (Since 1668 AD)
- No more tears and sorrows in your life, guaranteed

It should be noted that Peer Syed Sahib’s website is nonexistent.

Taco Bell (5 Points West/Birmingham) has taken the initiative to rewrite their Private Parking sign. Rather than get a new sign, they just took a sharpie and rewrote it.

This is the same Taco Bell that has a “Champion” parking spot.

Quite an interesting take on architecture that I found in 5 Points West. No windows? No problem! Just paint some on the house and they will look real!

Update:
A Festville reader sent in a revised photo on how he would have painted the house. It is titled “it ain’t vacant, just look like it”

Only in Alabama…well only in Marlow, Alabama. Capital of all things redneck.

Would-be boat thieves on Fish River abandoned their own boat and the stolen boats they had been towing when a pair of neighbors fired their guns toward them early Wednesday morning, officials with the Baldwin County Sheriff’s Office said.

According to a Sheriff’s Office news release, Johnny Calhoun, a resident of Honey Road in Marlow just west of Summerdale, was awakened by the barking of his dog at about 2 a.m. Wednesday. Calhoun went out on his deck, where he saw a man. The man jumped off Calhoun’s deck and ran away.

The commotion awoke Calhoun’s neighbor, Shawn Erickson. Together, the neighbors saw two men in an aluminum boat floating in Fish River. The boat was towing Calhoun’s paddle boat. The neighbors fired “warning shots” over the heads of the two men, who leaped into the water and swam to the opposite shore, according to the news release.

The suspects escaped. Deputies recovered the suspects’ boat, Calhoun’s paddle boat valued at $2,000, a kayak valued at $1,600, and a spotlight from the scene. The stolen property was returned to its owners, according to the statement. The aluminum boat was seized by the Baldwin County Sheriff’s Office.

Story

These prices are jacked up. I guess the extra cash goes towards the compounds or the Joseph Smith statue fund.

Baby Dress Without Bloomers
Poly/Cotton Blend
$44 and up

Teen Vest Dress
100% Polyester
$72 and up

This is one of my favorites…

Baby Onesie Shirt
65% Polyester 35% Cotton
$31 and up

About Us:
This site is dedicated to provide children with clothing that meets the FLDS standards for modesty and neatness. Our commitment is to offer quality, handmade, modest, affordable clothing. Each piece is made with joy and care.
www.fldsdress.com